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Thus Spake Zarathustra Folk cats rnd Fics PkMn FMA ¬_¬ other LJ Got Val? I defeat you!
I am going to pimp this guy out - Are we not men?
I am going to pimp this guy out
Here is a semi-transcript of my friend that I intend to pimp out. Please read, and if you like what you see, contact me and I will see what sort of arrangements we can make.



[
but I think I will charge a lot and not do to much work in the sack cus I am lazy like that
and afterwards I am an asshole cus I kick the chick out of the bed cus I they will have to give me more cash for if they want to sleep beside me
that and I snore too
and if they do sleep next to me they get the wet spot cus thats their crap/gue!
or maybe they should just bring newpapers the sloppy hoes!
no matter if shes really hot I just don't see the point of doing any serious work
I mean i get into it but the women that moan to much ruin my damn concentration and shit
so if they are gonna be loud that should be more cash for me too
cus I am good at sitting there and doing nothing
oh that and I don't bend myself in those stupid kama sutra postions thats just to strain on my crank so I just say no to kama sutra
I get double the regular cost of a screw per sitting down and doing nothing while they thrust
I see no problem with this
oh that and I don't eat, damn women!
oh and I don't do facial squirts either cus my own goo scares me too
I draw the line on goo
but I will be willing to half price my fee if they go for the BJ special
well thats the half price for the night on everything but if they use teeth then they pay times 4
and anything involves me sweating is also extra money for a fee too
i ma the best any though I don't do a damn thing in the sack
I am gonna find out and ask if they want the best non sex-sex in their life and see how much they will pay to hav me just sit their and let them work
they would pay me a fortune
hot ones of course
they wopuld pay me so much
well the non hot ones are loud and hornier which means more goo and messsiness all over my sheeets which doesn't work for me
but if they douse me with their gross goo I am gonna charge them extra unless they wear a bag or something
oh and if they have camel toes that extra too
but only if they are really it like doing all the work cus I am like that
I am lazy the pussy is just not what it used to be
oh and migets are half price all the way cus they are like funny and shit
oh and no tranformers in the sack either, I don't wanna hear thranformation sound and have a tree truck spearing me cus thats first sick and eew and then its just eeeeww
hell if shes a really hot mifget I might be give her a freebie
but not bloodly likely I am all about the money not the pune
I mean the pune will only take ya so far anyway but the money is a nest egg
better off me being a man whore who does little in the sack and gets paid well for it
work I can handle while sitting and doing nothing cus I don't any work in the sack
]

So, ladies, any takers? Don't be shy, it's well within your budget, especially if you are married to a CEO or something.

* puts on The Hat *

I'm all : enterprising
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